Five Minute University

They teach only what the average college student remembers 5 years after graduating.

Curriculum

- Foreign Language Course - Como esta usted? Muy bien, gracias. 

- Business Course - You buy something and you sell it for more. 

- Economics - Supply and Demand. 

- Theology - Where is G-d? Everywhere. Why? Because he likes you. (It's a combination of Catholic and Disney philosophies.) 

- Spring Break lasts 20 seconds. 

- If you want a law degree, it takes an extra minute. 

Graduation 

- Price $20; but that includes cap and gown rental, a polaroid picture of you wearing them, and your diploma.

Father Guido Sarducci (comedian Don Novello)